Parents (1989)

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 Summary:

Michael seems convinced that there's something wrong with his parents.
Despite having the glossy visage of a 1950s nuclear family, even the most mundane
of adult activities seem sinister. Especially when the dinner table is involved,
and more specifically what ends up on the dinner plate.

There's never a shortage of meat, when his folks are concerned.
Every night, the same announcement of  "left overs"
entices dual feelings of fear and paranoia for poor Michael.

His increasingly strange behavior begins to concern his
teacher & the school's child psychologist. Who of course feel compelled to meddle in his personal life.

Except the thoughts perceived as imaginative regurgitation from a child's brain.
May very well have some truth to them....

This leaves only one question....
When your parents are supposed to protect you from everything.
Who or what is supposed to protect you from your parents?

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Decision:

Effectively creepy and equally quirky, Parents is definitely a unique horror film.
It's almost like looking at a perfect shiny apple.
Only it's completely rotten on the inside.

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Availability:
Lions gate has recently released several horror movie 6 packs, and this title
along with Blood Diner and 4 other films. Can be purchased for a decent price!

Price: 4-9$

Considering the season I think that's a pretty awesome price for some appropriate Halloween viewing.

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Screen Captures: (No copyright infringement intended.) 

Blood Diner (1987)

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 Summary:

Two demented siblings under the tutelage of their murderous uncle's
talking disembodied brain. Open a vegetarian eatery that's recently recieved
a lot of positive buzz for it's surprisingly tasty veggie offerings.

Except the food is tainted with various items. And the restaurant is simply a cover for our
twisted goremets to scope out loose women. That they later kill and
farm body parts from. Hoping to construct a new body for their blood hungry goddess,
Sheetar, and an accompanying Lumerian feast.

Although, it would seem that this may not be an easy task with two detectives
hot on their trail.

French fried fingers, anyone?

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Decision:

Finally, this under appreciated classic is available uncut on DVD for the first time in the US!
Coupled along side 5 other films of varying quality. This movie definitely steals the show.

Genuinely over the top in every way. We have bountiful scenarios laced with
bouncing breasts and body parts. Conjoined together with hilariously hammy dialog.

Those looking for a non-pretentious good time, should enjoy this film thoroughly!
I know I did!

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Availability: This title is in print, and available with 5 other films on a two
disc movie pack from Lions Gate.

Price: 4-8$

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Screen Captures: (No copyright infringement intended.) 

Tokyo Decameron (1996)

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 Summary:

In this mid 90s pink film, 3 debauched tales unfold. Each story concealing
some perverse, twisted reality. Our first kinky morsel, is titled "Two Women Named Mariko"





Two women with dissimilar backgrounds. Find commonality from sharing the same name.
Only that is where their likeness ends.

Mariko A touts a childhood injury as the crux for all of her problems.
Not only is she bossy and temperamental. Her tendency to control and torment
the meek, unassuming Mariko B. Sets the stage for their unique friendship.
One that is not what it appears to be on the surface.

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Tale # 2 "Lesbian Dream"





After a lusty all girl's weekend culminates with the discovery of a
companion's bloodied corpse.The remaining women are left to question the events
that transpired the night before.

With the only drawback to the evening being the arrival of a seemingly naive
shoplifter, named Emi.Who after being subjected to the girl's various desires and whims.
Seems to have ample motive for murder.
Or does she?

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Tale # 3 "The Man In the Pillory"





Another usual night of drunken excess ends with Shizuo waking
in an abandoned warehouse, confined to a chair with his mouth sealed with tape.
Thoughts of his past keep him company. Until a mysterious woman in red appears,
ready to spill all of his darkest secrets. Acts so unforgivable that not even
a bottle of spirits could bury them.

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Decision:

Opposed to tantalizing it's viewers. This film quickly becomes a showcase of odd scenarios.
Themes of sadomasochism and warped relationships seem to be the ongoing subject matter.
Each story getting increasingly darker as the movie progresses.

Even with the lack of sexy times. Which really seems odd, considering the inclusion of Japanese adult star, Kei Muzutani. The movie is still twisted enough to keep you entertained. It's just not very sexy...or original.

"The Man in the Pillory" being the film's highlight for me.

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Availability:  This title is out of print, however, it can still be purchased from Amazon marketplace.

Price: 6-10$

Zoom In: Sex Apartments (1980)

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 Summary:

Saeko has grown tired of her domestic regime. Leaping at the opportunity to
visit an old flame when her cyclist husband goes out of town.

On her way to her lover's apartment. Saeko is accosted and raped by a gloved madman,
brandishing a sharp implement. Saying nothing of the occurrence, she still reunites with her former beau. Their romance rekindled by a passionate tryst. Easily topping the ordinary, missionary fumblings of her husband.

Throughout their reconcilement the bodies of numerous young girls are found.
Disturbingly close to Saeko's boyfriend's apartment. A deranged killer with an appreciation
for barbequed lady parts. Is lighting the loins of his victims on fire.

As the murders increase, Saeko begins to notice an obvious change in the personality
of her companion. Making her suspect his knowledge of her own defilement,
when a similar sharp tool falls out of his work bag.

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Decision:

Ordinary women driven half mad after discovering untapped pleasures.
Seem to be a common theme in these films. And in a primal, visceral way it's easily understandable.

Stylish Italian thriller leanings and general absurdity make for a more then
memorable viewing experience.

That being said, this title is very highly recommended!

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Availability: Released July 10th 2012, this title is still very much in print.

Price: 10-19$

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Screen Captures: (No copyright infringement intended.)

Eros School: Feels So Good (1977)

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Summary:

Ryu may be a recent addition to the student population at Eros High,
but he has already left a definitive mark on his female classmates.

Less then savory ambitions have him plundering his peers, and most of
the time it's against their will. Only the choicest in female flesh is sampled.
Leaving the school's beloved track star, Misa. (A recent victim to salacious rumors
questioning her sexual pursuasion, given her inate athletic skills.)
As the only attractive female student left who's managed to allude his wandering hands.

Making Ryu as determined as ever to deflower the school's track star.
Will he succeed? ;)

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Decision:

I was more then a little disappointed by the lackluster sex scenes.
The main male participant in the film does not even remove his pants before molesting
his female victims. Making the on screen antics less then believable.

One would think that the constant parade of rape would be enough to offend most people.
Additional distasteful scenarios involving bestiality and period blood, also add
a lurid sleazy touch. Only the film is really too goofy and casual to be truly offensive.

Although the ending is definitely.....yeah, I'll leave it at that ;)

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Availability: Oh my! A title Amazon does not carry, what a shocker!
Another 6/12/12 release from Impulse. This title is still in print, I would check out
Diabolik DVD or other online retailers.

Price: 14-19$

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Screen Captures: (No copyright infringement intended!)

Delinquent Girl Boss: Blossoming Night Dreams (1970)

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Summary:

Recently liberated from a notorious girl's reform school.
The rough and tumble Rika is having a difficult time finding her way.

After quitting her latest dead end job, she wanders the streets. Her tom boy demeanor catching the attention of an employee from bar Murasaki. A invariable hot bed of reform school girls, past and present.
Even the bar's owner, Umeko was a former school girl delinquent.

Already having so many things in common. Many of the girl's quickly bond with one another. Only to find that their homestead is being eyed for purchase by Umeko's sleazy uncle, Ohba. A man who has no qualms in sinking to new lows to ensure that his niece has no choice but to sell her beloved bar.

Looking for the perfect opportunity to betray Umeko. Ohba finds his chance after one of Murasaki's girls, Mari finds that her sister Bunny has been kidnapped for stealing a large amount of Ohba's recent drug purchase.

Thankfully, no self respecting bad girl would stand for such treachery.

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Decision: 

This title may be light on skin and erotic scenarios. Ultimately it makes up for that with it's inclusion of many Sukeban film staples. Including dangerously beautiful women, glorious girl fights, 70s fashion, and glimpses of Tokyo night life.

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Availability: This film can be found as a double feature with Girl Boss Revenge (1973) 
or it can be purchased on it's own.

Price: On it's own (11-20$) and as a double feature (16-24$)

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Screen Captures: (No copyright infringement intended!)

One Eyed Monster (2008)

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Summary:

An adult film crew decide to film their next low budget smut fest in the mountains
of Northern California. Where they remain stationed in a cabin located
on an old military base. Among the cast are veteran porn stars, Ron Jeremy & Veronica Hart.

During a break from shooting, Ron steps outside to enjoy some fresh air.
When suddenly a mysterious beam of light falls from the sky.
Aimed directly for his nether regions.
A "celestial " encounter the actor seems to quickly recover from before returning to set.

The scene then resumes without fail, until Ron loses control of his member and
unintentionally injures a fellow actress. The notorious member in question also decides
to detach itself from his body. The unfortunate trauma he does not survive.

Now the crew can only surmise that his penis has become home to some alien life form with dual intentions for procreation and murder.
And it's on the loose seeking any moist, warm orifice it can find.

It's 9 3/4 inches of pure terror!

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Decision:

And the monster dick films continue!

This movie definitely belongs in the realm of the party flick.
Ripe with boobs, blood and general inappropriateness.

I just wished Veronica Hart wasn't so under used!

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Availability: This title is available on Amazon marketplace.

Price: 5-16$

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Screen Captures: (No copyright infringement intended.)